Weight Watchers

Today I started Weight Watchers. I'm really quite scared, actually. Food has been my obsession for 24 years and that's a hard habit to break!

I am excited about Weight Watchers because it really teaches you how to make healthy choices from day to day.

Weigh-in is on Thursday. So check back in to see how much weight I have lost!

5K

I'm doing a 5K!!!! You should join me!
If not to support cancer, do it to support me. It would mean a lot to me to have you by my side! Let me know if you sign up

Who?
Runners, walkers and strollers of all ages are invited to help kick off American Fork Hospital's annual 5k

What?
A 5K! Approximately 3.1 miles.

Where?
American Fork High School (510 North 600 East, American Fork, UT)


When?
Saturday, June 23, 2012 at 7:00 AM


Why?
To support good health! And to support the fight against cancer. ALL proceeds will benefit cancer patients in our community who can't afford treatment. Each runner will receive a performance shirt (men's and women's sizing) and be entered into a drawing for prizes. 

How?
You can visit their official website or you can register for the 5K here


How much?
Only $20! Plus you get a T-shirt and all proceeds will benefit cancer patients in Utah County who can't afford treatment!!

Overwhelmed.

So, I am extremely overwhelmed and grateful for all of the support I have been getting lately from all of you. Whether it's on Facebook, this blog, in the grocery store, a simple note or text message I have truly been touched beyond words!

I had no idea so many people cared about me. Can I just say thank you? Thank you. From the bottom of my heart, for caring about me and taking a second to read my story and just for your simple words of encouragement.

Now I really can't mess up! I have to prove to everyone I care about that I can do something hard.

To be honest, I'm really scared of letting you all down. I feel like my life has been a repeat of letting people down over and over again. But I'm determined to change that. I know that God would never give me something I couldn't do. I can do this. I can do this.

As the little engine that could did, I need to keep telling myself, "I know I can! I know I can!"

That is my rant for the day.

P.S.
I had a Diet Coke today. So sue me!

Why am I doing this?

It's actually quite a sad story. I haven't felt that sad, hurt, disappointed and confused for a long time, if at all ever.

I met someone I was starting to really have true feelings for. This guy seemed to have it all and I was definitely falling in love with him. He said he was feeling the same way and so naturally he wanted his parents to meet me. I hadn't fallen this hard for a guy in a LONG time and I had never been so nervous to meet someone's parents. I'm really good with people and most parents I've met have easily liked me... so I knew I shouldn't be nervous. But I really liked this one...

For three days I fretted over the perfect outfit to wear. How would I wear my hair? What shoes would go good with my outfit? I think I literally spent about 3 hours (triple the amount of time it normally takes me) showering, blow-drying my hair to perfection and making sure my make-up was perfect.

The picture above was taken of Michael (name has been changed out of privacy) and me right before we were to meet his parents. Michael had repeatedly told me how much his mother would like me and how well we would get along. He described her has very friendly and good with people that I was most excited to meet her.

We went to dinner and I was introduced to his parents but his mom didn't talk much. Anyways, we went on with the night and I didn't think much of it. Everybody has "off" days and maybe she just wasn't as chatty as Michael had described her to be.

Sunday comes around and Michael had invited me over for General Conference (a televised portion of our church that happens semi-annually where we get to hear from our leaders.) After General Conference, Michael goes and talks to his dad about some business they had and I was left with his mom. I suddenly got really nervous. This was it. Either she likes me or she doesn't.

It was clear from talking to her for 3 minutes that she already didn't like me. I racked my brain over every conversation we had ever had how on earth she could have a negative impression of me and could come up with nothing. She talks to me for a little bit, asking questions here and there but it was the first time I had felt uncomfortable in front of someone in a very long time. She didn't seem to care about me or the questions she was asking me. She seemed to be doing it because she had to.

Later, when Michael was done talking business with his dad she asks if she can talk to him (Michael) privately for a moment. My heart sunk. I'm really good at reading people and their body language and it was clear from hers that she wasn't a fan of me. I hoped that I wasn't being paranoid and maybe she was talking to him about something else.... but something in the back of my head told me she was talking about me.

I remember the last time I felt like that was in High School. When some friends would back stab another friend to get up higher on the food chain. That's why I hated High School.... it brought out the worst in people.

Michael lives in Salt Lake and we were planning on making the 50 minute drive to Provo to introduce him to my family. I didn't wait long once we got into the car to ask the question, since it was burrowing away at my soul,

"what did your mom say when she pulled you aside?" I asked, hoping I was just being paranoid. I wasn't.

He let out a deep sigh and his honesty struck at my heart with the words, "She said she was concerned about your weight."

Wow. Really? I had spent all that time trying to look perfect and be perfect to meet someone when it wouldn't have mattered??? My weight is why she doesn't like me?

My heart felt like someone had just strapped a twenty pound weight to my left  and right ventricular valves. I started asking him more questions hoping that he had stood up for me, but I found out that he barely had.

To make a long story short, three days later Michael's mom came over and convinced him that a life with me was not what he would want... and then he broke up with me. That was the sole reason he broke up with me. That was it, his mother thought I was fat and it bothered her.

That night and days following were some of the hardest I have ever experienced. It's still really really hard. I still really care about Michael and I'm still trying to work towards forgiving him and his mother. Sometimes it just takes time.

Ironically, the same General Conference in which his mother pulled him aside about my weight was the one where I heard this quote,

If I have one message to Michael's mom, it would be not to judge me because I sin differently from her. Just because I wear my flaws so the whole world can see them does NOT mean I'm not an amazing girl who would have loved your son with a love you would have only hoped for.

As much as I would love to hate her... I don't. I feel sorry for her. And any girl Michael chooses to marry. And believe me... when I'm 80 pounds thinner I'll be smiling at you. And then, your son would only wish I was in his league.

The results are in....

So I wanted to give you all a summary of what's been going on in my plan to LOSE THIS WEIGHT.

1) April 4th, 2012 I officially quit Dr. Pepper.

Now, I knew this would not be easy... so I gave myself sometime to adapt to being off of it before I started my exercise routine.

2) April 9th 2012 I started exercising 4-5 times a week for 25-30 minutes at a time.

I know that doesn't seem like very much time to be exercising but it's not an easy feat when you are as overweight as I am. I didn't want to start to hate working out right from the beginning so I am easing my way into it. Plus, it's better then what I was doing, right?

3) Some time next week (when I work up enough courage) I am going to start to watch what I eat.

I hesitate to say the word "diet." Because I would like for it to be more of a "lifestyle." Where-as a diet is more of a temporary thing.

So, today was a really rough day. I didn't want to weight myself because I weighed myself on Wednesday and hadn't lost anything. I thought it was because I hadn't started my new lifestyle  of eating yet so I assumed today it would be the same. But, I decided to weigh myself anyways and.....

**Drum roll, please!**

 I lost 6 pounds!
 WOOT WOOT!

**does a fat dance**

ONE WEEK!!

So it's officially been ONE WEEK since I've quit Dr. Pepper and boy oh boy, am I sure feeling it!!!

Every SINGLE day I say to myself, "I really could go for a Dr. Pepper right about now..." but honestly, nothing tastes as good as skinny feels!

Dr. Pepper sure does come very close, though.

First Workout

I did it! My first workout!!! Kicked my BUTT, but I started and that's all that matters.

I got my heart rate up for 30 minutes. I know, I know... only thirty minutes? But I felt like I was going to die.
Anyways, I want to thank my room mate, Mary for coming with me. I've really been overwhelmed by the number of people that are supporting me on this journey already. I posted my first blog entry on Facebook and I was touched by the  number of people I thought never even cared what was going on in my life. I don't want to let you guys down. And I won't. I will do this.

Keep checking for updates!

Oh, also please note the water in my hand in the picture above. That's right people! It is day 5 off of Dr. Pepper!!! I know.... right?

Anyways, be a gem and leave a comment of support!

And so it begins...

Hi, I'm Candy Anderson-and I'm fat.

As I sit here typing, shoving Girl Scout Cookies down my throat, I am realizing that there is nobody to blame but myself. I'm fat because of me and my choices.

Eating unhealthy is the love of my life. I love it more than anything. It's always there for me when I need it - when I'm sad, happy, in celebration and boredom!

Well, this week was a giant slap in my fat face! And I am here to say that I am ready to break off this 24 year obsession with food and soda! Enough is enough!

I'm sick and tired of being fat. I don't wish this upon my worst enemy. Nobody truly understands what it is like until they have experienced it.

Please follow and support me along this weight-loss journey. This is going to be the hardest thing I ever do. But I know I CAN (and will) do it.

And so it begins...